Human beings connect in a variety of ways. Whether you’re working on your relationships with loved ones in person or using technology to connect with online friends, there are many ways we can form relationships. Some of those connections involve being attracted to one another. There are many different forms of attraction. It’s exciting when you connect with another human being, and there’s palpable chemistry. When they hear the word “attraction,” many people think of “physical attraction.” Some people are drawn to one another by the way they look. In addition to physical attraction, there are other ways that people connect. You can read more about the phenomenon of attraction on BetterHelp. Sometimes individuals are drawn together by mental attraction. When you’re drawn to another person because of their intellect or something about their personality that captivates you. Here’s how mental attraction differs from other forms of human connection.
What is a mental (or emotional) attraction?
Among the different forms of attraction is mental attraction. Mental attraction occurs when a person feels connected to another individual’s mind or personality. There’s something about that individual that resonates with them. When you’re around someone you’re mentally or emotionally attracted to, it goes beyond their physical appearance. You’re probably more concerned with what they’re saying, the stories they share, and their spirit or essence. Sometimes when you’re emotionally attracted to someone, their physical appearance becomes more captivating. There are some people who don’t care about how a person looks, and they’re more focused on how an individual is rather than how they look.
Is mental attraction always romantic?
The short answer is “no.” You may be emotionally attracted to someone, but there’s not always a romantic connection. You could be drawn to a person because you like their brain, and there’s no sensual connection. That individual may become a close friend. Emotional intimacy may or may not involve romance. You could have a profound affinity for someone’s personality, but you’re not interested in being their partner. When you have a close friend, it’s because you’re vulnerable with them and have a mental connection. That friend gets you on an emotional and spiritual level. Maybe you love your friend’s empathetic personality or their clever wit. These are qualities that attract people to one another.
When you’re mentally attracted to a person, it’s because you allow that person to see inside of your mind. One way that bond is enhanced is through meaningful dialogue. You and your friend (or partner) talk about topics that matter to both of you. Perhaps you discuss the meaning of life or what you want most in the world. Maybe you and the person who is mentally attractive to you discuss religion or moral views. The deep conversations you have with people who matter emotionally bond you to them.
Mental attraction lasts longer than physical.
Physical attractions are exhilarating. When you find someone with whom you have sexual chemistry, it can be an exciting sensation for both of you. However, the sensual flame that burns bright probably won’t last long. If a relationship is only based on sex, it could be thrilling, but it’s not necessarily based on emotional or mental intimacy. It could be entirely based on the physical connection. If a relationship is only physically-based, then it’s likely not as deep as an emotionally-based one. Mental bonds between people can be life-long. If you have a best friend, who knows the real you, that’s a special connection. If you nurture that bond, it gets stronger. If you’re in a romantic relationship with someone to who you’re mentally attracted, it has the potential to last as well.
All relationships take work, and healthy ones are built on mutual respect and trust. It’s special when you have a mental attraction or connection to someone. It’s a bond that you can nurture. Some people are scared of mental attraction. They might be fearful of vulnerability because that person has the ability to hurt them. If you’re someone who is scared to open up, it’s not hopeless. You can work through your fear of being vulnerable and form strong emotional bonds with people. Some of those connections may be platonic, and others could be romantic. Regardless of whether they’re friends or lovers, emotional intimacy is special. If you’re interested in exploring mental attraction, you can talk about it in therapy.
Nurturing relationships in therapy
Therapy is a safe space to talk about mental attraction and how it impacts your relationships. You can discuss any challenges you have connecting to others with a therapist. Whether you see someone online or in your local area, a mental health professional is dedicated to helping you better your connections with others. You deserve to form long-lasting bonds with people who care about you.
Photo Credit: Photo by Hamid Tajik
Author Credit: Marie Miguel Biography
Marie Miguel has been a writing and research expert for nearly a decade, covering a variety of health- related topics. Currently, she is contributing to the expansion and growth of a free online mental health resource with BetterHelp.com. With an interest and dedication to addressing stigmas associated with mental health, she continues to specifically target subjects related to anxiety and depression.